Better Than a Gift Given
by Frostmourne
Summary: He was a creature of the dark, living forever through the lives he ended. But when he passed through time accepting his fate of solitary existence, it was always her, the girl with the most brilliant emerald eyes that haunted him. DH Discontinued
1. Prologue

**Title:**** Better than a gift given**

**Author: **Haze

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Vision of Escaflowne so please don't sue me. I'm merely borrowing the characters for entertainment.

**Summary: **He was a creature of the dark, living forever through the lives he ended. His gift and curse was what would doom him for an eternity of solitary existence. But when he passed through time accepting his fate, it was always her, the girl with the most brilliant emerald eyes that haunted him.

**Prologue:**

It was too long time ago, when I stopped walking among the living. Too long ago, when I knew how it was to be customary or at least knew how it was to simply _live_. I can hardly remember all the things I did to pass time apart from being the creature of the night that I was, that I always will be.

I never did fear the dark. It was in me long before I had been given this gift… this curse. It lulled me into it, promising of sweet freedom from mortal coils. It was tempting amidst the turmoil that was my self. Very tempting indeed. I was foolish, reckless, and naïve. I did not realize what I was relinquishing as I delve more and more into the darkness within my self.

Of noble birth I was heir to vast lands and riches, betrothed to a lady of my same society. I had responsibilities as the only son and firm discipline had been enforced on me from the day I had been able to walk. My parents had been austere especially with the matter regarding my marriage.

Although my life had been that of luxurious living, it had been painfully restricting. I could not make my own choices… I could not breathe on my own. Every move, every thought, every emotion was tied down to the words of my parents.

The marriage was advantageous to both families and presumably for me and my lady. At that time, marriage by love was rare and even as I so desperately wanted to be one of those rare ones, I could not disobey. Neither could the lady I had married. She had cried and pleaded, true, however she resigned to her fate and allowed herself to be torn away from the one she had loved. I pitied her then, even more than I had pitied myself. She had more to lose than I.

But it came to pass, the marriage that would forever tie two choice-depraved people. I was nineteen then, she fourteen. Perhaps my parents were frightened that I would run away thus the rushed marriage.

During the first months of marriage, I would watch my lady from the shadows, when she knew not of my presence. She was beautiful, small, and fragile. I knew she would break, from the inside if not from the outside. And soon I was seeing her staring more and more into the flickering flame of the candles in the candelabras. Then one night, she drew a dagger.

I was painfully curious not to stop her. She gazed at the dagger and then her wrist before looking back at the flames and staring intently into it. Then, she slashed her wrist slowly, deeply. The crimson fluid held my attention in morbid fascination for a long while before I realized what had transpired. And I ran to her still form on the cold stone flooring.

After that night, I had her closely watched whenever I was away. I did not love her, no I could not. She had given her heart to someone else. I had only her shell, her body. But I understood her dilemma well enough. She wanted to die, end her misery and sufferings. She was fascinated by Death.

But I could not simply let her die. No. She was my responsibility. For the duration of two years, I foiled her attempts of self-demise and kept it hidden to the rest of the world. It was during one of the winter days when something else occurred.

I came back from a travel to find her handmaids in a fit of agitation just outside our bedchamber. And I knew then that she was at her attempts once again. I knew she wished I had come later for I always do most of the foiling of her attempts. I had dared not raise a hand on her, but I knew she feared me.

After my commands for her to open the door where left unheeded, I had the footmen destroy the door. Then I was taken by the arctic atmosphere than was our room. I narrowed my eyes on the wide open windows and then to her. With sure strides, I reached the windows and shut them with a bang, drawing the heavy velvet curtains shut. I eyed the fireplace and headed to it and made fire. Not withstanding my rising temper, I went to her closet and seized the garments I could grasp and dumped them into the fire.

For what seemed like a long time, I stared at the fire as it began to grow, heating the immense room painfully slow. But my control could only be so good and my patience could not wait for the room to heat up. I strode towards the bed and stopped a few steps away, eyes narrowing at the young lady seated there with dainty feet touching the plush carpet and her eyes staring straight in front to the now curtained window.

I stood in her line of vision but she seemed as if she was staring through me. She was ignoring me and I was ready to flare up and hurt her as well as I could. I was getting tired of her games of death. I treaded towards her with a few long strides and stared down at her. Her head tilted to meet my angry expression, her own face devoid of any emotion.

"Is this another one of your innovative ways of dying?" I had inquired harshly.

She merely looked at me and perhaps saw the rage blazing in my eyes, waiting to be unleashed on her.

"What is going on in that head of yours?" I had continued then in the same harsh tone of earlier. "Why do you do all of this?"

I could not take the urge of holding back and so my hands found their way to her arms. "You are---" I stopped and looked closer at her bluish lips before staring at my hands on her arms. One hand moved from her arm to her neck and with a change of tone from harsh to quiet I said, "You're very cold."

She just stared at me and soon, her eyes betrayed the emotions she felt; sadness and fear.

"Why?" I had asked in a less harsh tone. "You're not the only one in this. I am tied down, too."

I saw that she wanted to tell me everything but knew she could not tell what she herself could not comprehend. I kneeled before her on one knee and looked at her, determined to know what I had been wondering of for a time. "Do you hate me?"

She shook her head. She did not hate me, although I knew she wished in her heart that she could just do that. I simply held her all night, watching her as she slept. She was as tired of this as I was. And her heart had been making her suffer greatly of its loss of her loved one.

Soon it had been morning and I did not notice I had been for some time stroking her hair. Although people would assume that I took care of her because of the arrangement, it was not my only reason for doing so but rather because I felt compelled to do so. For whatever reasons, I could not fathom. But I wished most to understand her rather than venture for my reasons of taking care of her by sheer instincts. She was more complex than a strategy for war, more complex than anything I had encountered.

Her stirring broke my dazed stroking. She opened her eyes sleepily and looked at me.

"Good morning," I whispered, still stroking her hair.

She sighed and looked at me with eyes filling up with guilt by each second. She was feeling guilty for having to have me find her attempting to die once again. And for a long time, it was just like that between us. Then unlike she had ever done before, she snuggled nearer to me.

At first I was uncertain but I did not want to keep the question buried. I drew her even closer. "Is that supposed to be an apology?"

She nodded, causing her head to bump my chin.

I did not say anything for a time for I seriously contemplated on her action. "Then, would you promise me never to attempt dying again?"

She nodded and once more her head bumped on my chin a couple of times. But it didn't matter for a smile curved my lips. She made no attempt to move away from me. And since then I had been listening to her quiet breathing before she said something that had changed everything between us.

"Would you it be alright if we learn to love each other?"

I drew away slightly and stared at her emerald eyes that held such of my fascination that I could not look away. I merely nodded and she smiled, although shyly. And from then, everything went on smoothly between us. However, misfortune struck three years thereafter.

She was murdered in cold blood. I was devastated, having fallen for her during the course of the past years. I searched vainly to bring the culprit to his grave for more than a year. And during the time that passed, I was more and more eaten by my rage and guilt at not having been there to stop it from coming to pass. I did not even realize my thirst for vengeance was so great that I have not noticed how I destroyed myself.

I was withdrawn from society, keeping to myself to brood and brood about something that was out of my reach… my vengeance. My properties I had no care of and I have defied my parents' coaxing for me to let it all be. Everything I had managed to make of my life with her fell by and by. But I had not cared then. I blamed every single thing of my hardship to the murderer of my lady.

She was the only one who had truly loved me. Not even my parents had loved me as she had and I was damned by her brutal death. I delved deeper and deeper into despair and darkness. During one of my hopeless time, I had gotten myself once again into a drunken stupor although much worse than the usual.

When I had awoken, it was the beginning of a greater darkness that would follow my days. I had been tied on a bed and beside me sat a blonde beauty, blue eyes shinning with excitement.

"You're finally awake!" She exclaimed.

"Where am I?!" I demanded. "Why am I bound?! Release me this instant!"

"Oh hush! You are in my room, now be quiet."

"Who are you?!"

She smiled and bent down so close to my ear. I could remember shivering involuntarily as her cold breath caressed my ear. "I am Millerna and I will be your companion for years to come."

I turned my head towards her and looked at her intently, wondering what she had meant. She smiled, seemingly reading my thoughts.

"You are alone, are you not?"

I nodded absently then, drawn to her eyes as if it was beckoning me, hypnotizing me to agree with any thing she would say.

"Then I will be here for you," she had said so softly. "I have watched you very closely for a long time. And it came to, you are perfect. Too perfect to whither away and become nothing. It will be such a loss."

Absently, I had felt her cool hand caress my face in fleeting touches. I shuddered against her cool skin. It made her laugh.

"Yes. You are perfect. I want you to be mine. And I always get what I want. _Always_."

It was strange then, how her blue eyes turned darker by the moment as she whispered words to me, telling me how beautiful I was to be a mortal, how perfect I was to be hers, how fitted I am to be one of the powerful. I didn't understand then what she was and what she was offering me, but I could not help but fall deeper and deeper into emptiness as if she had pulled every feeling from me.

I was just staring into her eyes, pulled by it deeper and deeper into the darkness that had come to grown from inside me. At that moment, I had not cared what she was saying or what she was doing to me. I was just empty. I was numb. And I could not comprehend why.

For a fleeting moment, I felt a jolt of pain and a pulling of my life at my neck before everything began to fade. Darkness embraced me then and since I opened my eyes after many hours later, I was never allowed to leave Darkness ever again.

~tbc (if you like)~

**Author's Note: **How was it? Pathetic or what? Should I continue or just forget about this? Please tell me what you think. Oh and Millerna? Sorry, can't think of anyone who'd fit the place. By the way, another thanks to those who read and review my other D/H fics 'Intruder Alert 1 & 2' and my V/H fic 'Standing at the Edge of the Earth'. **Thank you for the support. It meant so much to me ^^,**


	2. The Lost One's Origin

**Title:**** Better than a gift given**

**Author: **Frostmourne

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Vision of Escaflowne so please don't sue me. I'm merely borrowing the characters for entertainment.

**Chapter Dedication: **Esca-lover, Caitie, ice, ShiAne, esca chick, Rina and Kechia****

**Summary: **He was a creature of the dark, living forever through the lives he ended. His gift and curse was what would doom him for an eternity of solitary existence. But when he passed through time accepting his fate, it was always her, the girl with the most brilliant emerald eyes that haunted him.

**Chapter 1: The Lost One's Origin**

"Stop it!" She hissed and slapped the hand away.

"B****!"

She was pulled on her hair and slapped hard enough that she could hardly stand. She felt that the room was spinning. The man stood up and threw her some money before walking away angrily.

"Are you okay, Hitomi?"

She placed a hand on her stinging cheek and looked up at the worried face of Yukari, her friend here in Sable's Lair. She accepted the offered hand of her friend and stood up.

"Damn ass," she muttered as she pocketed the money. "How am I supposed to hide this bruise?"

"Hitomi, I always tell you to be careful."

"I was careful. The damn guy wanted to take me to bed when I was serving his beer," she explained with irritation as she glared at where the man was once sitting.

Her friend sighed. "Well, just be careful. You know how it is working in bars."

Hitomi nodded and walked away, preparing to continue her job. She had to do this. If she doesn't work, she'd have no money to support herself. She cursed again and again.

She ran away from home at the age of fifteen. Home wasn't much of a home to her anyway. Her father had died when she was around two or three. To support the family, her mother had had many jobs until it came to the point where she became a prostitute to rich old men. After some time, she began blaming them for everything and was soon detached from them. This turned her siblings to rebellious ones. All too soon, her two brothers turned to drugs and began selling as well as using them. And her sister had become such a wayward girl acting like a slut.

There was a time when her sister's boyfriend had tried to rape her, her brothers' friends tried to play with her, and worse, her mom tried to sell her body to some rich man. That was the end then. She had to run away to save herself and she did, not caring where she would go. She just had to leave.

Walking aimlessly and hitch-hiking had led her here in Trojan City, a metropolitan in the progressive country of Zaibach. She had slept on the sidewalks, hungry for days until a brown haired girl named Yukari Uchida took pity on her and brought her to a little apartment in the bad side of town. They became friends then and had helped each other survive the harshness of their lives, she being alone by choice and Yukari being an orphan.

For five years they worked at night and came to school in the morning in some public school. It was hard but they had no choice.

"Hey,"

She sighed and walked towards a group of teenagers around eighteen and nineteen. 'Kids,' she thought. 'Wasting their precious lives trying to be on the bad side of things. How pathetic.'

The cool air of winter stung her exposed skin. She cursed wishing that she had a longer coat than the one she had that only reached up to her knees. It didn't even help that it was only a thin layer brought about by the constant wearing over the years that passed.

'I hope Yukari gets home safely from her over time. Gods! It's cold!'

"Well look here."

She ignored the following sneers and the unspoken words of what those guys were planning to do to her, used to encountering this being in this bad side of town. She kept walking. This was obviously a bad day for her.

Hurrying her pace and pulling the short coat closer to her, she cursed inwardly. The laughing followed her. 'I guess I have to make a run for it then.'

"Damn!"

She had cut her mid thigh early this morning while trying to outrun those guys when she climbed up a high metal fence. Wincing, she finished dressing up for her job. She'd just have to explain to her boss that she can't wear a skimpy mini skirt for a couple of days. 

Looking at a tight leather pants, she winced inwardly. It would be a pain to get into those especially with the wound, but it was needed for the job in Sable's Lair to appear seductive.

After the pain of getting the tight pants on, she pulled on a tight black tank top and proceeded to put make up on. A bit later, she was finishing the last touches of her make-up on. She checked her cheek one last time to see if the bruise was visible through the layers of foundation and was satisfied to find that it was not very much obvious.

A slight bang in the front door and a hurried walking signaled Yukari's return from school.

"Hitomi, you go ahead. I still have to change and we don't want to be both late."

Hitomi nodded and grabbed her coat on the way out.

"Sweetie, sit here a bit."

Hitomi was far more frustrated tonight as she dogged another arm. She was accustomed to customers asking for her company, but tonight was just so impossible. They were not only asking her but grabbing her and almost tying her down to the chair or to their lap. What was it that made them notice her anyway?

"Having trouble, green?"

She winced at the hard slap on her bottom given by her boss, Grava King. "Yeah, boss. It's a bit on the tough side tonight."

"Well, it's almost your time to bail out. Here. Your last one for the night."

He pointed to a far off table and she proceeded to bring the alcoholic drinks there. She almost sighed in relief when she saw that the man there had three female companions. The guy was handsome, couldn't be far from her age. She estimated that he was around twenty-five.

She placed the drinks there without any delay and was about to walk away when the man called. "Hey pretty, want to join us?"

Rolling her eyes, she turned to the man and plastered a seductive but uninterested smile. "Sorry, sweetheart, but I'm off shift now. Better luck next time."

She walked away then, feeling much pissed off when she heard one of the girls say that she's missing so much.

'Miss what? A bloody f***? Please,' she scoffed inwardly and walked towards where her boss was.

The following night she came to the bar with Yukari only to learn of news she had often heard before. The difference however was that the news were even scary than usual since the place of the bloody murders were now within where they were in the side of the city.

"Hitomi, do you think we should avoid going home without the sun?"

"Yukari, whether there's light or not, muggers and killers would still be swamping this side of town." She removed her coat and hung it at the back room before casually walking out of it to start her job.

Yukari shook her head. 'Someday, she's gonna get herself in serious trouble.'

'It's that guy again,' she thought as she passed by one of the tables in the darkest corners of the bar. She was just about to make her way back to her boss and get her coat for home when she was grabbed by the waist and slammed on the wall.

Her head hurt pretty much from the banging and she could feel herself getting faint from the blow. She looked at her offender and discovered two leering guys. Forcing her self to smile seductively, she said in a flirtatious voice, "Hey boys. I know you two want a piece of me but I'm off the shift."

She was about to move away but was then slammed to the wall once again. This time, the bang on her head was causing her to lose sight. And before she fell to one of the men's arms, she dimly saw one of them lick his lips in anticipation.

~tbc~

**Author's Note: **It's a bit short than my usual chapters but I'm still straightening a couple of things up so it'd be a match and that would lessen the confusion. But by next chapter, I think I'd be able to present longer ones. About the one speaking in the prologue, you'd find out in the next chapter or on the next one after. And about Hitomi's family's attitude or something, they do happen in reality but I just exaggerated it a bit so she'll really have a reason to run away.

            By the way, about the author's name, **it's still me Haze**. But I changed it for reasons that I'm ranting about in my bio. ^^,

**            Thank you to the people who reviewed the previous chapter. Thanks for giving this one a chance. I really appreciate it. Thank you so much. ^^, And I really have to mention them so thanks to Esca-lover, Caitie, ice, ShiAne, esca chick, Rina and Kechia. And since it was because of them that I got the chance to continue this… I dedicate this chapter to them.**

**            Thanks once again. ^^,**


	3. Emptiness Inside

**Title:**** Better Than a Gift Given**

**Author: **Frostmourne (It's still me Haze ^^,)

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Vision of Escaflowne so please don't sue me. I'm merely borrowing the characters for entertainment.

**Chapter Dedication: **Good Kitty, Izzy, esca chick, MysticalDreamer, YingFa, ShiAne, Rina****

**Summary: **He was a creature of the dark, living forever through the lives he ended. His gift and curse was what would doom him for an eternity of solitary existence. But when he passed through time accepting his fate, it was always her, the girl with the most brilliant emerald eyes that haunted him.

**Chapter 2: Emptiness Inside**

I was inside a bar in the city, passing time and looking for something interesting. I noted many of my kind, drinking away the night with the living around them. It was not new to me, seeing other creatures of the night mingling with mortals.

"Hey there gorgeous."

A girl, perhaps nineteen, came to me. I gave her one of my smiles. She smiled back, licking her upper lip in a seductive way. She does not realize that she is beckoning Death to her.

"Can I join you?"

"Do what you wish."

She smiled again and sat beside me as closely as she could. Soon enough, she was flirting more with me. She was foolish, flirting with a stranger such as I. Even if I was not a creature of the dark, she will surely bring trouble upon herself with this attitude she is displaying. She is even inviting me to share her bed. Such thirst these youths have for lustful deeds.

"What do you think?"

I looked at her. She was pretty although not so much. But she was too young for Death to claim her. I do not wish to rob her of her future. She winked at me and nuzzled my neck.

"You have a nice skin. It's so smooth, so white, and so beautiful like milk."

"Do you not have a class tomorrow?"

She laughed. "Yeah. But it's not like I'd be missed if I don't go to class for a day."

"You are wasting your life."

"And I suppose you're not? You're just a teenager like me."

Of course she'd think that. I had looked like I was barely twenty when I started not to age.

"See?" She said as if I had just realized my own stupidity. "So, how about the tumble in bed?"

I can barely stop myself from smiling cruelly. She was too young but even if I left her here, someone like me would claim her and give her death just the same. Besides, she was offering me herself. It would not do to let it go to waste. Slipping an arm on her waist, I led her outside the bar and into the nearest, convenient alley.

"Oh so you like it rough?" She asked with laughter in her voice.

I merely smiled as I led her to the dark. Immediately, her hands roamed my body, trying to divest it of clothes and stimulate it for the lustful deeds that it was to do with her body. However, she does not spark anything in me and I suddenly find myself bringing this dance of desires to its conclusion.

Lips sliding from her lips, it traveled to her jaw, tongue tasting the salt of her skin as it crept towards her neck. She moaned and pushed herself near me, grinding her hips against mine. Then, everything started to fade until all I can feel was her body's heat against my cool skin, until all I can smell was her racing blood against her veins and arteries, until all I can hear was her heartbeat.

As with usual, it was so hard to resist my nature. And thus I bit harshly, brutally. Her moans of pleasure changed to that of both pleasure and pain and soon she realized that she was getting weaker. It was only then that she realized what I am and she pushed against me in an attempt to be free. She could not scream out of fear.

It was maddening. The smell of fear in her blood, the taste of it was sweet, made even more so by the large quantity of it rushing to me with each frantic beat of her heart. And at last she wilted against me as the last of her life faded through her. I drew away, just in time to hear the last faint beat of her heart before it came to a halt.

I relaxed my hold on her thus letting her dead body slide from mine. For a few seconds I stared at her form. Such a loss but she had yearned for her own demise unconsciously. It was not mine to feel remorse for.

Straightening my attire, I moved out of the alley and began to walk back to the bar where I had met her. But as I moved towards my destination, something in me kept on coaxing me to turn back. At the end of a few seconds I did and allowed my feet to take me somewhere else.

I ended up in an alley a little further from where I fed on the girl. I looked upon the darkness there and through my altered eyesight I saw two of my kind holding on to a girl struggling slightly. She had just recovered from unconsciousness as proved by her slight struggling.

I watched in silence, not moving to keep them from noticing me. It was not in my nature to interfere and I knew better than to meddle with affairs that are not mine to deal with. However, as they crashed the girl on the wall, I had gone against my character. I had picked up two pieces of wood scattered near me. Without giving any chance for hesitation to come and for them to finally know of my presence, I plunged the wood on their backs. In an instant, they had turned to dust.

Mere specks, they were. Such weaklings. They had not even known what had befallen them.

I turned my attention on the girl. She was out of consciousness. I would've left her there as I had already interfered enough but I felt hesitation in doing so. I could not comprehend what was the matter with me at the moment and so I followed my instincts. I picked her up and carried her to my residence in the other side of the city.

I had to my advantage a great strength and an inhuman speed and so neither her weight nor the distance provided much of a trouble in accomplishing what my instincts told me to do. When I had reached my residence, I proceeded immediately to my room, placing her gently on my bed.

By this time, I really was puzzled by what I am doing. First off I interfere, then I bring her to my abode, and now I am letting her sleep on my bed. What had gotten into me, I could not identify. But perhaps I'd find out soon enough why she has an effect on my instincts. I would have to observe her till she wakes and question her when she does.

For a while, I stood there, looking upon her as she slept. Somehow, this brings me back to memories I'd rather not touch as of the moment. The pain is still stinging so much. But then again, it will never abate. The way it is now reminded me so much of how I had watched my wife when she had slept. 

I could not help but look away for a moment and clench my jaw tight. This was not the time to indulge in painful memories.

A moment later, I look back at the girl sleeping almost peacefully on my bed. She had hair in the color of honey, cut short much like that of a boy's. Her figure was slight that I wondered if she broke any bone from the abuse she had just had. She looked fragile… beautiful. And I knew then why looking at her reminded me of memories from a bittersweet past. She had similarities to my lady and it was terrifying to know the least.

I cannot keep her here. She must leave soon or she would die much like the others. And I can not bear this anymore.

I would rouse her but the look she had stopped me from even going beyond the thought. I will regret it if I would detain her more with my presence. I am nothing but the symbol of death. And as much as I want to end being alone, I would rather suffer an eternity of solitary existence than once more bring death to my long dead heart.

Just one touch and I would leave. Yes, just one touch.

So I reached out and ran my fingers on her short hair. She shivered when I had accidentally touched her forehead. It made me draw back instantly. And with one last look, I left.

~*Hitomi*~

I woke up feeling my head throb with so much pain. I gripped my head as I sat up. It was hurting like hell and I wouldn't be surprised if I'd get brain-damaged. Those jerks are really--- 

Wait a second. Where the hell am I? I remember being dragged from the bar to some alley and I even remember trying to struggle. And most especially, I remember being banged on the wall by those losers. But where are they? Oh no! They must have brought me to their place and did something to me. Oh sh**! If they raped me I'm gonna kill them so slow!

I looked down. My clothes were still intact. But I still have the scrapes I got from struggling. Now what is going on?

Looking around, I discovered that I was in a room of some rich guy. Obviously, I'm in the other side of the city, the part where rich people are living. But whatever. I need to get out of here before they come back and really do something to me. Sh**! My head hurts!

I stumbled out of bed and wobbly walked towards the door. I found myself in a hallway and I couldn't decide which way to go. After many minutes, I went to the left. I passed a couple of doors but I was sure that not even one of them was the exit to this place so I continued walking. By the end of the hallway, there was a huge door. I opened it slowly and peaked a little. There wasn't anyone there, thankfully. But it wasn't the exit either. It was just some library.

I walked in and immediately I could feel my heart begin to beat faster. I could feel the hairs behind my neck stand up. I looked around and almost dropped dead from fear when I saw that just a few feet from where I entered was an armchair where a man was sitting and staring at me.

I heard her footfalls before she came in. It was not noisy but I heard it just the same because of my enhanced hearing. A few seconds later, the door opened slightly before she walked inside the room. I watched her as she stiffened as if she can sense me. Then, she spun around and stared directly at me. She looked so frightened that I thought she would faint. But she just stood there, rigid and fearful.

I could smell the fear in her and I could hear her heartbeat. It was so fast and frantic that I fear it would burst any moment from now.

I stood up and walked towards her. However with every step I took, she took a step back away from me. She was frightened of me. Perhaps she had thought that I was one with those guys who attacked her mere hours ago. It would not do to scare her more so I stopped my advance. That, however, did not stop her from taking backward steps until her back was against one of the book shelves on the wall.

"Wh-where am I?"

Her voice had wavered, but I can see she was struggling to control her fear.

"You're in my residence, on the opposite side of town from where you were early morning."

Her eyes widened and in the dim light and the distance, I had to wonder what color her eyes were. "Why d-did y-you bring m-me here?"

"You needed help."

I could provide her no other reasons to that question. I would look like a fool if I tell her I brought her here because my instinct was pushing me to do so.

"Wh-who are y-you?"

"It's not important. We would not cross paths in the future anyhow."

"A-are you…" She trailed off and looked even more apprehensive.

"No. I assure you I am not with those who attacked you."

She stared at me, clearly measuring the truthfulness of what I had said. At length she relaxed slightly.

"Th-thank you."

I nodded slightly as an acknowledgement of what she said. I know it would be rude to tell her to go, but the longer she stays with me, the more in danger she would be.

"The sun is up. I am sure you would be safer if you go now."

She looked surprised. "You mean you'd let me go without asking for a payment for your help?"

Before I knew it, I had let out a little chuckle. I could not help it, I suppose. It was amusing how her surprise forced her to speak without stuttering.

~*Hitomi*~

I think he just lost his mind. I was just asking about some payment and he laughed. Alright, so I have no money to pay him but he doesn't have to mock me. Talk about a major egoistic jerk!

I didn't know but I just got so mad that I stalked up to him to glare. But when I was near him, I couldn't stop myself from gawking. I don't know why I didn't notice it the first time I saw him but he was well… hot. He was so pale that I thought he had no blood circulation under that perfect skin.

Damn! If only I could have that skin. I've always wondered how I would look if I had a skin like that. But of course I can't have that. I get burned in the morning walking to school and during the first hours of the afternoon to go home and get some sleep before work at night. Besides, I can't get a nice skin because I don't eat much. I lack nutrition, well, because money is kind of short on me all the time.

His hair is also so nice. It was shining faintly in the dim light of the room. I wanted so much to reach up and just feel his silver hair. I just want to know how it was to have that hair. And his lips. They were blood red. I'd give anything just to feel them or more like have them.

I wish I was beautiful. Just like him. But I can't be beautiful because I don't have money to be one, because I don't have money to maintain being one… because I don't have the reason to be one. Nobody loves me anyway other than my friend, Yukari. And when she'll go marry someone, I'll be so alone. Like when I was back with my blood relatives, like when I had run away. I wish I wasn't so alone.

She had stalked up to me and glared but soon enough she was staring at me, as if both scrutinizing and envying what she saw. She had looked wistfully at me, so many emotions passing her face as she did so. And then she looked at my hair, reaching out only to stop in mid air and look at my lips instead.

Her heartbeat had calmed gradually and there was almost a heavy beat to it. She was sad. I could tell perfectly from the way she looks, the way her heart and breath had slowed almost to a heavy pace.

When her eyes met mine for a brief instant, I noted for the first time that she had green eyes. I had wished that it was not so. It only made her resemblance to my wife even more pronounced.

If I had needed to breathe, my breath would've been caught in my throat. The emeralds were not brilliant… they were dull and gloomy. They looked so much like that of my lady when she was sad. And before I could stop, I tilted her chin slightly and kissed her.

The kiss was merely a slight pressure of my lips against hers but it felt like heaven, like I was with someone I knew with my heart and soul… when I had one at least. A second or two later, I pulled back and looked at her eyes. I felt crushed then for her eyes had turned glassy, teary.

"I'm sorry," I said.

She blinked away her tears and looked at me. She shook her head and took a step back, a big step back. But she was still within arm's length from me.

"I'm sorry," I repeated.

"I… can I go?"

It was strange that when she asked that, I could feel a part of me breaking off.

"You're free to leave as you wish."

She hesitated before she walked passed me and left. My former feeling had been strange indeed. But the next one was even more so. For when she left, there was suddenly this void inside me. I had always thought that I was long empty. But her departure had just proved otherwise. Because how can a void form when the void is there to begin with?

Yes, she had just proved that. When she had left, the emptiness came much like it did when my wife had died, much like it did when I died. When she had left, everything just disappeared… I felt empty once again.

~tbc~

**Author's Note: **I know that I still have yet to name the one with a cultured tone of speaking but I think I had given some clues here for you to figure out. Besides, you know the pairing right? ^^, Anyhow, I know that the events are a bit slow moving not like that of Intruder Alert's scenes but this moves on to a different beat of its own. And before I forget, I'd try to make up for the short chapter by updating faster while the ideas are still here ^^,

      I'm taking this chance to thank those who reviewed **'Standing at the Edge of the Earth' since I wouldn't be posting another chapter there thus I wouldn't have the chance to acknowledge them. ****So I'm thanking aradow, Izzy, Tinka, bighug, bigkiss, naria, Mia, aoao, Phoenix, YingFa, Snooptopian. Thanks for reviewing my one-shot.**

**      Anyhow, thank you for those who gave this one a chance and thanks for the support. I do appreciate them. And as I said in my other fic, each chapter is possible because of the reviewers. So you know who's responsible for this one. ^_~ Thank you once again. ^^,**


	4. In the Coldness of the Dark

**Title:**** Better Than a Gift Given**

**Author: **Frostmourne

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Vision of Escaflowne so please don't sue me. I'm merely borrowing the characters for entertainment.

**Chapter Dedication:** Caitie, esca chick, Izzy, Magicman/Smokegirl, ShiAne, Kechia, MysticalDreamer

**Summary: **He was a creature of the dark, living forever through the lives he ended. His gift and curse was what would doom him for an eternity of solitary existence. But when he passed through time accepting his fate, it was always her, the girl with the most brilliant emerald eyes that haunted him.

**Chapter 3: In the Coldness of the Dark**

I walked back to the other side of the city and by the time I got there, it was already in the middle of the afternoon. I went directly to the small apartment and sprawled on the narrow bed. I was so tired that I promptly fell asleep.

The next thing I remember was that Yukari was trying to wake me up for work. I wasn't up to working after what had happened the previous night but if I don't work the small amount of money Yukari and I have would even be smaller. So I went to work and tried my best to ignore the throbbing of my head. I never told anyone about what happened. It doesn't matter anyway. They have their own lives, I have mine. It's none of their business anyway. They wouldn't give a damn.

But I couldn't stop thinking about the guy who had helped me. He was so beautiful. And there was something about him that's familiar. But I swear that was the first time I ever saw him so it's really impossible for the familiar stuff to be even mentioned. Maybe he has a feature in him that I saw in someone or maybe I saw him in some print-out materials. Yeah, most likely.

I also couldn't stop thinking about the kiss or if it was what that slight touch of lips could be called. Thinking about it makes me wonder why he had such cold lips. When he had pressed his lips on me though, I couldn't help but feel my tears try to get away from my eyes.

For the first time in my life, a guy showed me gentleness. Whenever a guy would come to me, in the end I either get slapped or being verbally degraded for not letting them touch me. Whenever they would come, they just grab me and force themselves on me. And it brings back so many painful memories of the past… when I had almost been raped, when I had been played at while I was high from the drugs my brothers' friends forced on me, and when my own mother had tried to sell me to someone else…

I wondered if I could have someone like him who'll be nice to me and help me without demanding something in exchange. I wondered if I could have someone like him who'd show me gentleness. And I had wondered about many other things at the moment when he kissed me. Things that I knew since long ago I could never even hope to have. And it tore me inside. Fate had been cruel to me, showing me things I cannot have… trying to provoke me to hope for something that is beyond my reach all the time.

And so I left even if I knew that I might never see him again. I supposed then that it was better that way. He was nothing but a reminder of what I can never have.

For the following weeks, I never saw him again. But sometimes, I feel how I felt when I first saw him in the library of his place. The hair at the back of my neck would stand up and I my heart beat would increase in its beating. And then, there's also this tingle on my back that I couldn't really understand…

"Hitomi, are you sure? I mean it's so scary. These past weeks, there had been awfully lot of murders in this side of the city. And the serial killer hasn't been discovered yet."

I put on my coat and looked at Yukari. "Serial killer? Come on. How could all those murders be related to one another? Do you think someone could kill at least ten people in a night at different areas in this side of town?"

"Then it's even more scary coz this would mean that there isn't just one killer. Do you think there's some demonic cult doing this as some offering to the demons?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yukari, stop thinking weird stuff. You're too old for that stuff being told to children to make them scared enough not to stay awake past their bedtime. What's next, some demon would come swooping down and kidnap us if we walk alone in the middle of the night? Come on."

"But Hitomi, we're not sure about our safety."

"We never were, Yukari. Never were. And never will be. Don't worry. I can take care of myself. It would be just the usual thugs who'd cross me if I'm so damn unlucky."

"How can you be sure? Hitomi, the murders have been near bars!"

"If it's my time, it's my time. But don't worry. I won't go down without a fight," I grinned and was just about to walk away when Yukari grabbed my arm.

"I'm just worried, Hitomi," she said and then leaned in to whisper. "You're all that I have."

It was both heart-warming and heart-wrenching. Heart-warming because at least someone cares what happens to my miserable life and heart-wrenching because it only reminds me how much alone we both are in reality.

I gave her the best reassuring smile I could muster. After all, I'm still scared out of my guts to walk home alone especially in the dark. But I just had to because I still have some assignments for my morning class. Besides, I need to sleep and if I'm lucky enough to finish my assignments in two hours, I'd still get at least three hours of sleep.

"Don't worry. I'll take care. See you tomorrow later then."

I walked out of Sable's Lair and hugged the coat closer to me. It was so cold that I decided to take the shortcut through some alley. I'll just have to climb some fences because if I stay out in this cold with my short and thin coat and the thin layers of clothing underneath, I'll most likely die of the cold soon enough.

I had wished that there would be no thugs there and I was thankful that my wishing had paid off. But I never knew there were more than trouble coming from thugs and cranky customers. For when I reached the end of the alley, I saw a man and a woman with golden eyes as they each let go of a limp body.

Dimly I could see that around them, there were at least two more dead bodies.

"Dessert is served," the woman said, smiling in a scary way.

I tried to move, but I couldn't. It was like my feet were glued to the ground. I was so scared.

"What's the matter, little girl? Are you scared to run?" The man taunted.

Then, I couldn't understand but I was jolted back by that taunt. I spun around and ran. I ran and ran, not caring which direction I was going. And when I was sure that they were not following me, I slowed down to a walk. I was so exhausted that I slumped on the nearest wall.

But then, I saw two pairs of boots in front of me. I looked up and saw the man and the woman standing so near me, golden eyes gleaming. I didn't even notice when they got there. I just know that I was resting for only a couple of seconds. What are they anyway? Some superhuman beings?

The woman stepped closer and lifted me off the ground by gripping me by my neck. I could feel the air being locked out of me and my eyesight began to dim until I couldn't even remember what happened next…

I stared at her sleeping figure as she lay in the middle of the bed.

Why couldn't she be more careful? Why couldn't she just stay out of trouble? This is the second time she ended up with two beings out to feed on her.

There had been times when I would watch her ever since we've actually had exchanged words. It was a good thing that I've decided to watch her just a few hours ago. She had been persuading her friend no doubt about going home alone from the way they had looked. When she had left, she had so foolishly gone into an alley.

Hasn't she learned her lesson? I for one know that once is enough to be taught a lesson concerning life-threatening situations. And yet she ignores her experience with alleys. It's not just about alleys. Haven't she heard of the death rate in this side of town? If she keeps up with that attitude of hers, she'd be in need of a death-wish soon enough.

I know I should not be around her, that I would be nothing but a constant attraction for death to befall her. But if I hadn't interfered, she would've been sucked dry of her life. And if I had just left her there after I dusted her two assailants, she would've frozen to death before anyone finds her.

What would I do with her? I cannot stay with her and I do not want her dead. But either she is with me or not, she will die eventually if she does not take more caution. Unfortunately, it seems she is headstrong about being so recklessly foolish.

She is tiring me. And to give a second more thought, this is only the second time she had a brush-off with death and I am already exhausted. She is much more of a trouble than I thought. I wish I could just leave her. But I am drawn to her like a moth to the fire. Perhaps it is because of her frightening resemblance to my wife…

It is unfair to both her and I. Fate is playing one of her shattering games once again. And once more she had her fancy on me. She would cause me torment once more, I am sure. Yes, another death that I cannot stop would be Fate's finale in this period of time.

Fate mocks me. This has been the fifth time in my existence that she had shown me the same girl. I know it would end the same once more. I would be responsible for her death. And it would be another load of heavy guilt on me. What of the girl's life? Fate does not care who her pawn would be. Existence is nothing but a board game and unfortunately for me, there would be no way out. For once I had crossed path with her, no matter what I do, I will always be the reason for the girl's death.

Is this my punishment for being a creature of the night? Why does Fate mock me again and again? Why does she have to make her point again and again that I am incapable of saving the woman I loved?

I am tired. I wish I could sleep. But I cannot. The only part of me that is tired is my mind. My body is still full of energy, energy that I should be using for my hunt. It would still be a few more hours before sunrise, and a few more hours of mind torture.

I looked at the fire blazing in the fireplace. I had not always loved the fire. It had scared me before when my wife's body had been cremated for me to keep her ashes. Because when the fire consumes anything, you cannot bring it back. But when I had my chance on vengeance, the fire had been there as a symbol of the way I felt.

Yes. I had wanted everything to burn then. I had wanted them to feel the burning I had felt when I had found my wife dead, when my revenge had been out of my reach.

Fire. It destroyed them and it became an ally. And soon, I had found much more use for it other than to destroy what I loathed. Fire is warm. Even when it cannot warm me inside, at least it gives my cool skin heat and reminds me just how much physical warmth can be comforting…

~*Hitomi*~

My throat hurt so much. It's like my neck had been squeezed so hard. Damn! Am I dead or what? I sat up and held on my throat. Sh**! That b**** surely did squeeze me with all her damn strength! My throat was hurting so much like its burning from the inside!

Then I noticed that I was on a bed. I looked around and nearly jumped. A few feet away from me was a chair near a fireplace where a familiar man sat, looking at me with piercing red eyes. His silver hair gleamed faintly from the fire's light.

~tbc~

**Author's Note: **I've got some problems. **I'm having some difficulties in trying to pull this one out. **Probably because I got used to Hitomi and Dilandau the way they are at Intruder Alert series. So I might have trouble updating this soon. Not that anyone would care. Another problem is that my head is swamping with craving for magical or weird stuff and I'd go nuts if I don't get them out. But as I said, I can't seem to pull this out but I'm having some craving. And another problem, my sister is adding to that by asking me to do the story of magic stuff. It's so hard. I think I'd go crazy.

      But before I do, **I'd like to thank those who reviewed the previous chapter. Thank you so much. It helped me in this one. ^^, Thank you, thank you, thank you.**

**      To Izzy, hehehe.** I guess I've my sister to thank for the 'uber-spiffy' new name.


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